Dear Toot,

You're still a banana, but tomorrow, there is a very exciting bit of produce on the way.

I want to talk to you about something important today. I have been hesitant to bring up this subject, but I think it's a conversation we need to begin. There is going to come a time when you will be compelled to ask me about God.

It's a tricky subject. Your father and I both grew up in ostensibly Christian homes, but we have sort of drifted in our own directions. I have recently been going to an Episcopal church that I like a lot, and your father isn't into organized religion at all. For him, the universe makes sense on a more mathematical level than on a necessarily supernatural one. As if this weren't enough, by the time you read this, you will probably have made some friends who are Jewish, Muslim, Buddhist, agnostic, atheist, or some faith I know even less about. You're probably wondering what to make of all of this. I don't blame you a bit. You have to be asking yourself - with so many different answers, which one is right?

Well, Toot, this will probably get me some flak, but I am just going to say it. I do not believe that there is only one path to God. A lot of people will disagree with me on this point, but I have to believe that if God is infinite (and, by definition, how could he not be?), then it seems silly to suggest that there is only one right way to get there. If God is everywhere, then it seems to me that every path must eventually reach him, however much it may meander on the journey. The important thing is just finding a path that makes sense to you.

I'm sorry because I know that this will confuse you for a while. It would be easier for you if I could say, "this way is the right one, and everything else is wrong," but I just can't. I have struggled with this a lot because, in all honesty, it may be more difficult to raise you this way than if we had a rigid doctrine to rely on. But the truth is that I am less concerned with making sure you adopt a particular set of rituals than I am with helping you understand the ideas at the heart of all the major religious traditions. My prayer for you is that you learn...

... to respect the magic and mystery of life, and to view all life forms with awe and reverence.

... to approach the world around you with humility and gratitude, and to use it gently.

... to avoid judging others, and to try always to see things from their perspective.

... to be generous to those less fortunate, and to know that it is only luck that keeps you from being in their circumstances.

... to value justice, but to value mercy and compassion more.

... to understand, somehow, that you are both a tiny, barely significant speck in the universe and the most important thing in it.

What's funny is that you may never have these huge spiritual questions that I am so worried about how to answer. Your father has a very calm, contented soul. He doesn't feel driven by all the vast, cosmic questions that burn in me. It's entirely possible that you will turn out just like him. If you do, you will probably be happier. But there's something to be said for the other route too...

Frankly, this whole pregnancy thing is the closest thing to a religious experience that I have ever had, and you are the biggest, most intriguing mystery that I can imagine. I can't wait to see who you become.

Love,
Mom

21 weeks, 7 days in the oven